Smile

I just got up and read my daughter's new blog. Words cannot express the pride and gratitude I feel when I watch and listen to my daughters. Everyone of them. It's something I know most mothers can relate to, but it still overwhelms me and brings me to tears to see the lives that I gave birth to, and raised, being used so greatly by our wonderful God. Awww.... I'm just taking that in.

My husband and I had a "downer" day yesterday. Surely you know what those are, right? I know Christians really aren't supposed to have those, and honestly I don't usually have too many. The fact has always been when my husband is "down" I'm always up - and vice-versa! Yesterday was an exception. We were both down. Bummer.

Finally, toward the end of the day, I said, "let's just get it out" (something he never has a problem doing, but I do). So, I said "we'll take turns - you say something that's frustrating you, then I will, then back & forth, until we're emptied." Not really wise - as the Bible says that our words should be encouraging. :-/

So it began. Since we're pastors, 99.99999% of our "griping" had to do with things in our church. Oh, it was not pretty! We went on from dirty carpet and walls needing painting, to why so-n-so isn't growing spiritually, etc., etc. After a while it actually sounded stupid and pathetic. Which, indeed, it was. But, honestly, we felt better. Ha! Not just to get it off our chests, but to see wow, that's it? That's all we have to complain about?? How blessed we are!

I began to sarcastically state the many ways we were so NOT blessed (sarcasm is kind of big in our house). "Yeah", I'd say, "we don't have anything good! We are pathetic! We're worse off than anyone I know!" Now, it was sounding really pathetic! Right in the middle of this "pathetic conversation", a board member called to speak to me. Hmm..

After that phone conversation, I had to wipe my eyes, and explain to my husband how the church wants to help us with our many mounting medical bills. After that, another call from our oldest daughter, telling us how her 6 year old just led yet another child to the Lord - over school lunch! That call was followed by one from our youngest daughter, Bekah, saying how much she loved and missed us. All these conversations took place in our wonderful home, provided by our church, with our two silly dogs sitting with us, as we enjoyed dinner.

How utterly ridiculous, I thought, to waste our breath complaining about silly things that for the most part we cannot fix or change. Realizing how there are so many people in the world that have real pain, and have no hope. Just every once in a while, I guess, I need to be reminded why we're here... why we exist, and why we are in the ministry. To bring HOPE.

I heard it said recently that "Worship is us smiling at God and blessings are when God is smiling at us". Wow, I hadn't worshiped God much that day, nor smiled much, but suddenly I felt very smiled upon!